The "Do You Need to go Fuck Yourself?" Test

I've created this test for one reason and one reason only.  There are a lot of people in the world that need to go fuck themselves, but don't know it.  Here is a simple 10 question test that will determine whether or not you need to go fuck yourself.

1. Do you own any books written by Dr. Phil?

2. Have you ever driven under the speed limit in clear traffic conditions?

3. Do you play "Dungeons and Dragons"?

4. Do you find me attractive?

5. Have you ever gotten someone pregnant/been pregnant before graduating from high school?

6. Did you vote for Al Gore?

7. Did you vote for George Bush?

8. Have you ever taken anything Michael Moore has said to be entirely true?

9. Have you ever been to Destin?

10. Do you drink for the sole purpose of getting drunk?

Answer key:

0 yes answers:  You fucking liar.  Go fuck yourself.  (This of course does not apply to Nicole )

1-3 yes answers:  Unless one of the yes answers was to #3 or #8, you don't need to go fuck yourself.  You just fucking suck.

4-6 yes answers:  You have to go fuck yourself, but not too hard

7-8 yes answers:  Hard up the ass with a porcupine

9-10 yes answers:  I'm ugly as hell, and you can't vote twice.  Go fuck yourself, then jump off the Empire State Building while holding  a sword to your stomach.